coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

Are those…cum stains?

Poor Car Talk joke. Forgiveness, please.

For those who are not in the know, Michael Tiller is an infamous YouTube uploader whose shoddy PowerPoint pseudosimulacra of game shows have gained him the ire and ridicule of anyone who has eyes, ears or a combination of both.

For those who don’t know what I’m talking about, take a peek at this. This is probably an average Michael Tiller work. I’d rather gouge my eyes out.

If you look at the comments of this article, you’ll get to see candid (because MTillz has two speeds: candid/oblivious or dead) responses to a parody video I created of his work, because someone’s gotta put this kid in his place, and I figure satire should be the best way.

So, what are his thoughts to someone giving him honest (yet brutal) criticism of his bullshit?

It was awful, made me sick. He even believes I steal people’s pictures, and I told him the truth last night, and I got BASHED! My projects are much better than that satiric thing. I guess just some people don’t like the way I do my projects, I do what I can. Yeah, it’s best you don’t see that parody. His reasonings are so terrible, I was sick to the stomach. He even went as far as to bad-mouth my projects when I told him the truth.

Someone get this kid a grammar guide. I will admit it, I was very harsh with my criticism of this kid’s work, and here’s why. If you look at the shit I did when I started making my game show fan games, you can tell I was a beginner. I didn’t know how to use my tools and I didn’t have any skills. As I continued to make games, I learned how to use my tools, I learned how to use better tools, and I gained important skills. So, I started with Flash 4, and now I’m proficient with Flash CS4, Photoshop CS4, Final Cut, Amadeus and GarageBand, to name a few. I managed to channel the passion I had for my craft into practical skills. Any criticism I received (and I got a lot of it) was used to created bigger and better things.

MTillz? Not so much.

Here’s a direct letter he sent me via YouTube’s messaging system in regards to my criticism. (MST3K-style comments are in parentheses.)

pacdude, Michael Tiller here.

(You know, since the user name didn’t give it away.)

rjaguar3 has informed me of your parody that you did of Millionaire, which I saw and was very shocked by what I saw, it was absolutely sickening, for unexplained reasons.

(If you got sick for unexplained reasons, then how is that my fault? Perhaps you should explain why you got sick.)

After a conversation with rjaguar3, he told me these were the reasons you believe my projects aren’t so hot

(Aren’t so hot? That’s like saying Snooki isn’t so orange.)

which is what led you to that parody:

1. Sound effects aren’t accurate

(Point 1, swing and a miss. It’s not that your sound effects aren’t accurate, MTillz, but it’s that your sound effects are edited in poorly, are unconvincing and unprofessional.)

2. Using people’s photos from Facebook

(I’m sorry, should I have said Friendster?)

3. Playing the game with subtitles

(Because nothing’s more riveting on a game show than reading.)

4. Using questions all people don’t know

(Again, that’s not the problem. The problem is that you create these videos for an external audience i.e., the world, but write questions that reference the inside of your delusional imagination. Can you see how that’s an issue, fuckwad?)

Let me go ahead and explain these to you, so at least there is some understanding here.

(I’ve seen your grasp on the English language. If you can explain anything to the point of understanding, I’d be impressed.)

1. The sound effects, I try to keep them in accurate positions and use what the show had used. If the sound effects aren’t available, I use something as a substitute in its place.

(I respectfully submit the website of Jay Lewis; specifically, his Game Show Sound Effects archive. Every sound effect from every game show is pretty much here, so I have a hard time believing that the sound effect is unavailable. Fuck your shit.)

2. The people you see in my projects, they’re my real-life friends

(I have a hard time believing that you have real-life friends. If they were your real-life friends, wouldn’t you then bring them to your real-life home and have them record their answers on their real-life computer? Or are you just lying to me to save your sorry ass? I don’t know, take your pick.)

and I make sure ahead of time that it’s all right with them to do that sort of thing.

(How vague. I hope “that sort of thing” is “take pictures of their feet because goddamn do I have a foot fetish.” Or is that off topic, MTillz?)

3. I use subtitles because I do not have a voice converter on my computer.

(Actually, I do. It’s called Voice Candy, and it converts my voice to a robot. However, I don’t think that’s what you mean. I think you mean a voice recorder, and yes you do, because you can record your own voice. I think you’re too stupid/lazy/stupid to find what you need. Skype, anyone?)

I am wanting to use real voices in the future, but cannot do that as of yet.

(What fucking country are you from? “I am wanting to?” Who the hell let you out of middle school? They need to be drawn and quartered.)

4. I remember only one instance when I used inside questions, and that was Blockbusters.

(There is a post on the Game Show Forum, which is behind the member wall, that shows 3 instances thereof, so suck on a bag of farts.)

I since then have learned my lesson and am using certified questions that everyone would know: either written down or researched on the Internet, or if I am using a home game, I use those questions.

(You know, when I made Drop the Bomb, I wrote over 400 original trivia questions. Is it really that hard for you to find a fact and ask a question about it? Then again, you could barely put together a sentence if you had a box of Magnetic Poetry and your hands out of your pants.)

Using the inside questions were not known to me until I was told, and I originally didn’t understand until a trusted friend of mine told me what the problem was.

(Your seemingly impossible ineptitude at basic sentence structure aside, if you can’t realize that a question that mentions a specific part of your life isn’t common knowledge, then either you’re functionally retarded or so self-deluded that you make your own monthly updates on status and projects that no one cares about on YouTube. Oh, wait…)

SInce that point, I have focused on using certified questions.

(Certified by the Association of American Douchenozzles.)

You see, I am diagnosed with Asperger’s, which is a social disability. If you don’t understand what Asperger’s is, I advise you to look it up on Wikipedia.

(Mercy ploy. From the article: “…there is a predilection for adults to self-diagnose it. There are questions about the external validity of the AS diagnosis.” Not to say that you don’t have it, but noting your propensity for exaggeration, I’d like a note from your physician. Plus, your precious Wikipedia article gives notions for treating Asperger Syndrome. Are you following up on those are you accepting what you have as a crutch to ignore other people still?)

Some things for me are difficult to undersand at first, but then when told to me, that’s when I begin to understand it more. If you have any further questions, please let me know.

(Why can’t you take criticism, no matter how biting, hurtful and sarcastic, and channel it to creating a decent and useful project? Why do you insist on creating poorly-created PowerPoint presentations? Why do you disgrace this earth with your putrid nonsense?)

mtiller2006

So, that’s his letter. Honestly, if Michael Tiller could channel his energy into making things even remotely better (and maybe using real people’s voice once in a while) then maybe people would stop hating on him. Until that happens (and I predict that Mayan predictions will come true far sooner), I’m going to mock him mercilessly.

coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

This is the next in a series of posts giving my top five of everything: top five authors, movies, books, fonts, colors… anything and everything I can think of. Most of these lists, unless otherwise specified, aren’t in any particular order. Here’s the next list: my top five TV shows.

Cory’s Top Five TV Shows

1. Arrested Development. I know I say that these aren’t in particular order, but I’ll be damned if Arrested Development isn’t the most clever, funniest and smartest show that ever aired on network TV. Every character plays their part to the fullest in every episode, and the complex foreshadowing that only become funny after watching a few times. The funny keeps up enough that watching the same episodes over and over don’t get old, they get better, like a fine wine. Buying the DVDs would not be a huge mistake.

2. Scrubs. Ignoring the current season that’s airing on ABC (mainly because it’s fresh, new and should be treated as a spin-off anyway), Scrubs is one of the few single-camera sitcoms that I could, again, watch over and over again. The story lines are interesting, and the fact that the entire show was taped pretty much in one giant hospital-cum-production lot is the icing on the cake. Coupled with the fact that every episode has at least one song to go and buy from iTunes, Scrubs runs the gamut for entertainment.

3. The Price is Right. Christ, again with the game shows. Yes, yes, it’s a game show, but it is an influential game show. It’s single-handedly shaped the landscape of daytime television. It’s given us catchphrases, a wicked awesome fight scene, numerous Family Guy skits and something to look forward to when you’re home sick from school. Its format hasn’t changed in over twenty years and even though people give Drew Carey a hard time, he’s still a great host for a show that remains an American institution.

4. Law and Order. In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate, yet equally important, groups: the police, who investigate crime, and the district attorneys, who prosecute the offenders. Law and Order has been the de facto standard for procedural crime shows since its inception in 1990. (Christ, it’s been almost 20 years.) Even though the people change, the times change, and the courts change, the intrigue that the show (and its spin-offs, which are almost as good, if not better, than the original) provides in its hour-long slot leave little to be desired.

5. Chappelle’s Show. Now almost long forgotten, Dave Chappelle’s foray into sketch comedy was another game changer that deserves frequent second looks. As Richard Pryor did in the 70s, Dave Chappelle used racial stereotypes and taboos in order to not just be funny, but for America to take a long hard look on how race is treated in the modern age. Sadly, the show was canceled after the third season due to someone crossing the line, and if Dave Chappelle thought the line was crossed, then the line must have been very crossed. Still, the shows are a humorous and poignant look at race issues in America.

coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

This is the first in a series of posts giving my top five of everything: top five authors, movies, books, fonts, colors… anything and everything I can think of. Most of these lists, unless otherwise specified, aren’t in any particular order. Here’s list one: my top five movies.

Cory’s Top Five Movies

1. Slumdog Millionaire. The combination of dynamic storytelling, amazing visuals and a surprisingly accurate portrayal of a game show make for the best movie of 2008, by far.

2. Quiz Show. Yeah, yeah, I know. Two movies with game shows in them. Rest assured, dear reader: White Men Can’t Jump will not appear just because Rosie Perez’s fine ass appeared on Jeopardy!. Robert Redford’s directorial debut chronicling the rise and fall of the 1950s quiz show is less about the game show and more about the drama between everyone involved.

3. Up. I’ll admit it: the movie made me cry. Then it made me laugh. Then it intrigued me. Then it warmed my heart. Just like a good Disney movie should. Pixar has a hard time doing any wrong.

4. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. Although not a great translation of Douglas Adams’ book, the H2G2 movie was entertaining enough for me to watch over and over again and enjoy it. Not many movies do that, which is why The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy gets on the list.

5. Helvetica. I know that I really should not be making Top Five lists since I put shit like Helvetica on the list, but give me a chance to explain. Gary Hustwit’s documentary Helvetica is not just a movie about a font; it’s the on-screen experience of a group of influential people discussing the aesthetics that most forget but no one should take for granted.

coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

The History of Game Shows is an ongoing series of articles about the history of game shows from 1500 to the present. This week’s article is about the popular game show, Family Feud.

At the very least catch phrase fodder for American pop culture, Family Feud is one of the staples of game shows in America today. Originally a spin-off of the bonus round from Match Game, Family Feud has been surveying 100 people, with the top 5 answers on the board, for over 30 years.

Dawson1973’s Match Game was, in 2 words, da bomb. The combination of host Gene Rayburn, the massive amount of celebrities, and of course, the dirty questions, made for a ratings smash. One of the regular celebrities, Richard Dawson, shows an incredible amount of competence in playing the game, plus a charisma and likability that made for excellent television. Mark Goodson and Bill Todman, always the forward thinkers, decided to convert the Super Match portion of the Match Game into a new show, and cast Dickie Dawson in the starring role.

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coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

homer-loves-bufferingI’m an avid TV watcher. Yes, I like game shows, but my love of game shows is only a subsection of the half-hour joys of bite-size narrative digested weekly or daily.

As an aside, I once had a theory that movies and TV used to go through cycles: TV shows would generally be terrible while movies would be great, then once movies as a whole started to suck, those writers would move to TV and TV would get better, and on and on. I can’t prove that and I don’t have data to start, but it’s an interesting theory nonetheless.

My viewing habits, however, are piss-poor for such a TV fan. The cable I have is about to bite the dust (the cable box works when it feels like it) and I don’t want to have to go all the way upstairs just to watch some TV.

So, I’m investing my time in watching TV online. Everyone’s talking about how watching shows online is the wave of the future or what have you, and I’m more than happy to surf that crest. However, what’s the best place to watch shows online? I put different network’s offerings to the test to see where I can get my fix easiest. For the sake of full disclosure, I’m running a MacBook with Mac OS 10.5.7, with 1 GB memory and a 2.16 GHz processor, and I’m piping all this through a Verizon DSL line that isn’t very fast.

cbs66CBS.com/video is the Columbia Broadcasting System’s foray into online video. My experience with CBS wasn’t bad. Video won’t work with AdBlock Plus activated, and there’s no idea how loaded the video is (no indication on the play bar, no “buffering” indicator… nothing). Generally, starting the video and pausing it allows the video to load enough that, after a few minutes or so, the video starts to play. The commercials are unobtrusive and video quality is good, but no options exist for better (or worse) quality. They even have a 1080p HD channel, but neither my processor nor my connection could handle it. Their selection includes recent episodes from the entire CBS primetime lineup (I can watch the last full episode of How I Met Your Mother, the entirety of the 9th season of CSI, and episodes of 60 Minutes ranging as far back as January), recent episodes from the CBS daytime lineup (which is why I can watch The Price is Right and my girlfriend can catch up with the last two weeks of the Young and the Restless), episodes and clips from CBS’s late night shows and even classic full classic shows such as the Twilight Zone, the Love Boat and Family Ties. Overall, a pleasant experience.

nbc56NBC.com/video/library has a wide variety of videos available, and their video site is very well organized. No wonder NBC.com won the Webby Award for Broadband website. Full episodes include full runs of Miami Vice, Quantom Leap, and the most of the current seasons of shows like Kath & Kim, Southland and The Office, as well as recent episodes of Leno (soon to be Conan, fortunately) and Fallon. Their player is solidly built with some flaws. Just like CBS, there’s no way to know how much of the video is loaded at any given time. Also like CBS, there’s no quality settings. A fun feature of the NBC player was the almost instant access to any other show or episode via their ribbon-like interface at the bottom of each player page. By default, it gives you the option of different DVD-like “chapters” (which are portions between commercial breaks), but you can also browse other full episodes or other shows all together. When an episode ends, it’ll play another video or give you suggested options of what to watch next. That’s a handy feature for the bored viewer. On the thumbs down side, the way the advertisements work is a kind of a dealbreaker for me; I don’t like my advertisements to obtrude so much. The advertisements sometimes are larger than the video, a large pet peeve for me.

abc89ABC.com has only one feature going for it: automatic quality scaling. If your internet’s bandwidth starts to lag, the sound and video quality degrades so the stream can continue downloading. If your bandwidth picks up, the quality gets better. How does it do that? Well, in order to watch shows from ABC.com, you have to install a plug-in in order to watch it, which is annoying since everyone else allows you to watch shows via Flash. The fullscreen viewer is ugly, and the advertisements are intrusive and don’t automatically advance. Just to watch videos from ABC.com is a pain in the ass: video automatically plays when you login, and to watch full episodes, you have to open a pop-up window. To watch Scrubs online, ABC.com opens about 3 different pop-up windows just to get to the episode selection screen. Easily, the most annoying of the Big Three networks. As a matter of fact, instead of watching the Scrubs finale on ABC.com, I shelled out the $3.98 to download the shows from iTunes. Took longer to watch, but so very hassle-free, it was completely worth it. I’d rather watch Oprah eat a bushel of lobster in a bikini than have to watch TV on ABC.com ever again.

What’s my final verdict? Obviously, it’ll depend on what show you want to watch. In terms of user experience, you’ll get the most bang for your bandwidth at NBC’s website. CBS’s comes in a close second (and those HD videos, if you can get them to stream, are jaw-droppingly gorgeous), while ABC’s a distant 5th, behind not watching TV and gouging my eyes with soup spoons.

coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

This article was started on September 16. Shows how much of a procrastinator I am. Enjoy, nonetheless.

Yesterday, I was fortunate enough to head up to New York and watch a taping of the new season of Who Wants to be a Millionaire? By the way, special thanks to Trisha, the audience coordinator and very gracious host, for dealing with me whilst I hung around the set all day.

I suppose this post will have two functions: one, to inform the reader of what exactly goes on at a taping of Millionaire; and two (and this point has two sub-points), to explain the changes that have been made to the show while explaining that no, they are not in fact gay, stupid, or ill-concieved.

First, a recap of the trip. I woke up at a bright and early hour and made my way to 30th Street Station. I booked a BoltBus the night before (thank you for fronting the money for me, Liz!) and waited patiently for the bus. Now, the stop for this bus isn’t special; there’s not a shelter or anything. It’s just a sign on the rickety 30th Street bridge between Market and Chestnut, behind the Post Office. When a truck passed on it, the whole thing rumbled. Eventually, the bus showed up and I sat down. Boy, I’m taking BoltBus more often. They have power outlets on every seat and WiFi on the bus. I should’ve taken my laptop, damnit.

Well, one Preston and Steve podcast later, I woke up in Manhattan at 6th and Canal, with 30 minutes to get to 67th and Columbus. Of course, that is when I realized that I was sorely under-prepared to traverse the Big Apple. All I knew was, I could catch the 1 uptown to Columbus Circle and maybe run from there. I managed to get above ground with 10 minutes at 66th and Columbus. So, the view that Manhattenites got was a fat kid running down 67th Street at a very, very slow pace. (As an aside, I think I skip faster than I can run, cementing my place as the world’s manliest 6-year-old girl.) Eventually, I reached ABC Studios where Kevin, a young man in a headset, assumed that the portly gentlemen lunging toward him was the one who was late for his guaranteed seat in Studio 2 and asked if I was Cory. I assured him, out of breath, that I was, and he signed me in and directed me to the studio.

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Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

If you have a problem with me, what I say on Buzzer, or how I treat people who shoot from the hip instead of logically thinking things through, ESPECIALLY in a place where it was unwarranted, you should talk to me in a private forum instead of acting like a bitch, protecting yourself via the public forum.

When I say shit, I mean it. When I see something wrong with how you pussy-ass fuckers are treating a fucking television show and how it’s affecting your mundane, boring, sexless lives, and I’m going to fucking say it. Why? Because you need to analyze how you’re treating things that are inconsequential to modern society. Yes, I love game shows. Yes, I love the Price is Right. Guess what? If the show got canceled tomorrow, I honestly would shake it off. I’ve got 30 years of shows to catch up in the meanwhile.

And you know what? Golden-Road, bless the sensible members, has some of densest members I’ve ever seen. Intelligent discourse is interrupted with “I Like It’s In The Bag” and “But what about if they paint this wall green?” and it drives me crazy. I like Golden-Road. I honestly think that it’s served the community well, but a majority of the members put things so out of context that it drives me insane.

coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

As most people who read this blog know, I’m an avid fan of The Price is Right. Even through all the changes that have been made, even through the first year of New Drew and the second season of Controlling Drew, I’ve stuck by the Price is Right because at the end of the day, there’s still six pricing games, goofball nervous wreck contestants who don’t know what they’re doing, and money and prizes to be given away.

Ludia, the fantastic developers who seem to be creating shovelware but are actually creating good solid games, also are fans of the Price is Right, and it shows with their Wii, PC/Mac and DS versions of The Price is Right. Each version has their own strengths and weaknesses, and the DS version, which I received via a wonderful gift from my girlfriend for our one-year anniversary, is no different.

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coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

When I was in 3rd grade, I wanted a way I could play Wheel of Fortune at school, without mucking around with trying to shove a board game in my bookbag/lunchbox. I drew the puzzleboard (complete with those cool spikes they had in 1996), a rudimentary Wheel (which I actually formed as a strip of values, to fit easier on the paper) and a used letter board. I slipped it inside a plastic sleeve and it became dry erase.

It actually served me pretty well, and in the event that you may have a binder or a notebook or the ability to laminate, this remade version may serve somewhat well.

Wheel of Fortune (Dry Erase Edition) (9.5 MB PDF Document)

coryanotado: (Default)

Originally published at The Fast Money Round. You can comment here or there.

This is my running commentary for the 37th Season Premier of the Price is Right. If you’re not prepared for spoilers, then it would be a good idea to not read this until or while you’re watching the season premier. Now, this isn’t really the greatest commentary ever, but picture it like Mystery Science Theater 3000: you kind of have to see it to get it, I guess.

11:00 AM: It’s in High-Def, and I’m watching it on a big screen tv that’s sadly not HD-Ready. Let’s see all the radical changes that exist. We’re going to hid the rest of the commentary behind a cut, just to appease everyone.

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coryanotado: (silly - range game)
OTHER NOTES: You can read this liveblog, with some extended stuff, at BuzzerBlog here: http://buzzerblog.flashgameshows.com/tpir-liveblog-spoilers-ahoy/

Here, guys. A Cut. For you. )

As per...

Aug. 18th, 2007 02:36 pm
coryanotado: (Default)
...this image:


Comes this image:


Ahhh, <3 photoshop.
coryanotado: (game show - Family Guy Feud)
At the game yesterday (La Salle vs. St. Joe's at the Palestra ::drool::), my friend Tom and I had a conversation about the greatness of the Palestra. I point out one flaw.

"The letters on the scoreboard: they're not very clean-looking. The font set that the scoreboard uses for their eggcrate letters is kind of robotic and bumpy. If they used something like a Ferranti-Packer set, it'd look much better."

Please, someone, shoot me now.
coryanotado: (silly - shoe polish)
Dean Cicala asked me if I could recreate 1 vs. 100, the new NBC game show, here at
La Salle. Those in the game show know know that's kinda hard to impossible.

I just might try it.
coryanotado: (silly - I pinch)
Suzanne.

She is my girlfriend.

She is on fall break.

Now, what is a girl to do when she has a fall break and a boy in Philadelphia?

Perhaps, maybe, she should come to Philadelphia and spend the weekend!

What I'm trying to say is, Suzanne is here! On my bed! Reading about sustainablility for generations to come! Tomorrow night here at La Salle, I'm hosting Family Feud. There are a multitude of puns, catchphrases, and book citations I could make here, but let's be for serious: I'll spare you of those for now.

Let's hope someone (and I guess I'll call my boss tomorrow and remind her because Lord knows I'm going to forget this anyway) brings a camera so that I can look pretty, if not professional.

And I don't want to wear a tie tomorrow.

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